finding joy

most days i don't even have to find the joy. it's always just there and easy to see. but some days, it's a little harder to find. on those days, i have to consciously not let the difficulty of the moment cloud my view of the joy. because the joy is always, always there - even amidst struggle.

last weekend, we decided on a whim to drive up to pine mountain lake and spend the weekend at a friend's cabin for his birthday. we thought it would be fine. no - more than fine. we thought it would be FUN. but it was...different. it was a weekend full of struggle. liam and wyatt's autism was "showing" and they had a hard time coping with the different environment and schedule, or lack thereof. there were lots of meltdowns, lots of tears. liam was up all night screaming, "i don't like this bed! i hate this bed!" wyatt cried for pretty much the entire time we were there and wouldn't sleep without me rubbing his back. and if i stopped, he would wake up and start to cry again. it was just difficult. plain and simple. so difficult that we cut the trip short and only stayed one night instead of two.

in between the meltdowns, tears, and struggle, i had to fight hard against my own emotional weakness and find the joy. but, like it said, it was always there. lots of it. 

i found joy in waking up on saturday morning to birds chirping 

and cool, crisp air coming through the patio door.

i found the joy in the big boys having the time of their lives in the woods. 

i found joy in the ease my presence brought to wyatt.

i found joy in the mister starting a bbq with pizza boxes and flint because we didn't have lighter fluid.

 i found the joy in liam squealing in delight when he saw the deer roaming right beside the cabin's deck.

  

 i found joy in watching cooper relaxing on the ottoman, just like he does at home. 

i found joy in watching wyatt sleep with his little bumbum in the air.

i found joy in our hike to the playground.

 

i found joy in the cute little diggers they had in the sandbox.

i found joy in liam's curiosity.

and i found joy and serenity in the beauty of cabin life.

we bought a house!

we signed the purchase contract for our very first home purchase last saturday! yippee skippee! we are really excited for more space for the boys and the boys are just excited to have stairs. that was their sole request for our new home - too funny.

as excited as we are, this will be a true test of patience because the house is still being built. it's not scheduled to be complete until september 25. so for now, all i can do is drive by and gawk at it every few days until it's done. that is, until the construction workers call the cops on me for stalking them.

this picture was taken when we found out that the house was reserved for us. june 30, 2012.

this one was taken the day we signed the papers. july 7, 2012. 

i also took some pictures of the model home, so i could share what the house will look like when completed! {{{{{squeal}}}}}

the exterior of the house. 

it will be the same color scheme and the same elevation, which is basically just what the house will look like from the outside. ours will have the stone at the bottom of the pillars and the shutters on the windows. our particular house is also a corner lot, so it will have a wrap-around porch.

view of the formal living room and dining room from the top of the stairs. i've already told the boys that they aren't allowed in this area. hahaha

the stairs feed into the kitchen.

and here is the kitchen, the most important part of the house, in my opinion. :) 

i spend a ton of time in the kitchen - prepping, cooking, baking for bake sales, making lunches, blah blah blah. i'm SUPER excited for all the space and the kitchen island. and that door on the left? a WALK-IN pantry. lord knows we need it, for all the food these four boys consume.

my favorite part of the house, and also what drew me to this floor plan, is how open the kitchen is to the family room.

it is, literally, one big great room. the kitchen and family room are the two rooms where our lives are lived, so lots of space in those areas is really important to me. i can't wait to fill it with big comfy couches for the boys to lounge around in.

now, i'm trying to wrap my head around paint colors for the bedrooms. it feels like choosing a color is harder  than choosing the house i wanted! insane...

i heart craigslist

today's awesome craigslist find - an old school desk with lift top for $20. the best part was that it was in the next neighborhood from my own, so i didn't even have to go very far to get it. this is going to be perfect for the boys' study/play room. i'm thinking I will paint the lift top in chalkboard paint and the rest of it in distressed white. can't wait!

super reader

3-year-old liam reads a book to me!

swim! swim! by lerch